Financial Stress and Its Impact on Marriage

Money is one of the leading causes of stress for American couples. In fact, a recent survey by Ramsey Solutions found that 35% of married couples argue about money at least once a month. Additionally, money was listed as the number one factor that contributes most to overall relationship stress and anxiety.

Couples who report struggling financially tend to be much less happy in their relationship compared to teams that feel economically secure. So, what exactly does financial stress do to a marriage?

In this blog post, we will share the impact of financial stress on marriage and also tips and strategies for coping with final stress sin as a couple.

The Impact of Debt on Marriage

A heavy debt burden is one of the biggest sources of financial stress on a marriage. According to a study published in the Journal of Financial Therapy, couples with higher debt reported more conflicted marriages than those with lower debt levels.

Research by NBER shows that couples with higher debt tend to argue more frequently, especially regarding budgeting and spending decisions. This constant conflict can breed resentment and negatively impact marital satisfaction over time.

Marriages tend to suffer most when couples have arguments over spending rather than earnings. For example, if one partner overspends or racks up credit card debt without telling the other partner, it can seriously undermine the trust between them and cause anger regarding the betrayal of shared financial plans.

Debt problems can be overcome if couples communicate openly and honestly about their debts and commit to getting out of debt.

Financial Issues Impacting Intimacy

When couples feel stressed about money, it can spill over into the bedroom as well. Researchers have found that financial stress is associated with decreased relationship and sexual satisfaction. Nervousness over debt or unpleasant arguments about missed bill payments can cause partners to feel emotionally disconnected from one another.

Furthermore, financial difficulties may cause partners to withdraw affection from each other. Couples experiencing money problems or job loss tend to report less hugging, kissing, and cuddling between partners.

Researchers speculate this decrease in physical intimacy could be due to sadness, anxiety, or the fact that arguments over bills sap couples’ energy and desire for physical closeness.

Partners should be aware that affection often suffers during financial crunches and consciously make efforts to continue bonding.

The Link Between Finances and Infidelity

Several studies have shown correlations between financial distress and increased infidelity rates. This is especially true when the male partner struggles with income loss or bankruptcy.

Researchers speculate financial providers may pursue affairs in an effort to shore up self-esteem or seek understanding that they aren’t receiving from their spouse during financially stressful times.

Meanwhile, women impacted by a partner’s job loss tend to report steep declines in their own life happiness and relationship satisfaction.

This despair can cause them to stray as well. Couples should understand how damaging financial stress can be and make earnest efforts to offer comfort, compassion, and moral support when faced with income disruptions. Shared coping as a team can help guard against infidelity spawned by money problems.

Impact on Mental Health

A 2015 study published in the Journal of Family and Economic Issues linked financial debt and strain to increased symptoms of depression. Data showed that just a $1,000 increase in debt predicted significantly worse psychological well-being among both male and female partners.

Additionally, research shows that relationship conflicts over money tend to linger longer psychologically compared to other types of fights.

Left unaddressed, constant money worries and fears can significantly impact couples’ quality of life and contribute to anxiety or sadness flares.

Partners experiencing financial troubles should monitor each other for signs of withdrawal, anger, or a decline in enthusiasm for social gatherings and favorite activities. Speaking openly about stresses and providing emotional support can help safeguard mental health.

Coping with Financial Stress as a Couple

Research clearly shows that financial strain correlates with decreased relationship quality and happiness. However, money stress doesn’t have to ruin a strong marriage.

Several strategies can help couples work together to cope with rough patches and even draw them closer in the process.

1. Schedule Recurring Money Talks

One of the best things couples can do is set aside time each month to talk about their finances openly and honestly.

Choose a neutral time when you are both free of other distractions and unlikely to be tired or stressed about other issues. Sit down together with your budget spreadsheets, bank statements, and financial goals.

Calmly discuss outstanding debts, necessary expenses coming up, areas where you may have overspent recently, or any worrisome income reductions. Don’t lay blame on past mistakes, just focus on solving problems.

This provides a safe space to air anxieties and align on financial priorities. When you tackle issues head-on before they escalate into heated arguments, it reduces money discord.

2. Set Shared Money Goals

Another exercise that brings couples together is to actively dream about future financial goals. What are you saving money for?

Do you hope to buy a house one day, retire early, or take an exotic vacation? Defining these big-ticket goals as a team focuses you on the same prize, breeding motivation, team spirit, and closer bonds.

Make sure to articulate mini-goals too, like having $10,000 in emergency savings by next year or putting $500 per month towards the kids’ college funds. Reviewing progress during monthly money talks reignites that shared purpose and excitement. Small milestones mark relationship wins as much as individual ones.

3. Communicate Supportively

When tackling financial worries, couples should make communication safe and supportive. If a job loss or disability threatens income, speak openly about resultant fears and anxieties without blaming or shaming. Comments like “I’m terrified we’ll lose the house” invite compassion, whereas barbs like “If only you had stayed in that other job” will just heighten defenses.

Validate each other’s feelings about money conflicts and avoid hurtful criticism. Partners can take turns being the “speaker” and “listener” – where one vents emotions without interruption, as the other offers sympathy and understanding. This builds intimacy faster than trading toxic accusations.

4. Seek Budgeting Compromises

Often, partners have differing money management styles – one leans towards spending while the other prefers saving. This breeds endless clashes. When finances get tight, couples shouldn’t insist on “my way or the highway” budgeting. Instead, find middle ground through reasonable compromise.

For example, the saver may dislike expensive salon visits but agree occasionally treating oneself prevents feeling deprived. Meanwhile, the spender commits to redirecting those funds towards building savings once splurges hit $100 a month.

Making small concessions shows commitment to supporting the other’s well-being during crises or transitions.

5. Celebrate Successes

As couples work together to pay off debts or amass savings, it’s important to celebrate milestones loudly and proudly together! Pop some champagne when that final student loan payment gets made or go out for a nice dinner after reaching $5,000 in emergency savings.

Marking financial successes cements positive team spirit and gives couples energy to persevere towards the next goal.

Even small daily wins deserve cheers, like sticking to the grocery budget or having a no-spend day. External positive reinforcement from a partner builds useful money habits faster. Over time you begin associating good financial behaviors with victory, partnership and fun – this boosts commitment to cooperate on bills.

6. Seek Professional Guidance

If tensions over financial issues are causing intense relationship conflict or distress, don’t hesitate to seek outside help.

Many couples benefit tremendously by meeting with credit counselors, financial therapists or psychological social workers. These professionals mediate constructive dialogues about money that heal rifts rather than exacerbate them.

Through counseling, couples pinpoint whether struggles stem from income shortages, disputes over spending philosophies, lack of budget transparency, or failures to communicate financial needs kindly.

Getting an impartial third-party perspective helps take heated emotions out of the equation. Money problems have solutions when attacked cooperatively with expert guidance. Seeking help is nothing to be ashamed about and can prevent divorces.

The key is addressing financial stresses as a team. When couples stop pointing fingers about past money mistakes and instead align their efforts proactively towards a stable future, they often reconnect intimacy-wise, even in periods lacking material comfort and abundance. With compassion, compromise, and professional support, most stormy fiscal seasons can be weathered side-by-side.

Conclusion:

During stressful times filled with worries over income, expenses or debts, couples shouldn’t underestimate the small gestures that foster intimacy – holding hands, saying “I love you,” going for walks.

Softening towards each other and expressing verbal affection can provide comfort when bank accounts seem low. Partners must strive to not let money problems harden their hearts. Prioritizing emotional connection first is key to preserving marital closeness and satisfaction, even in leaner years.